Lucid Dream?

 Lucid/OBE of late 5/1/22

I want to get this written down before I lose it.

Last night was probably the most profound experience I've had this year.

 The location I was at was probably the Park, and I was in commune with two other consciousnesses. One I felt was my mother and the other I could not identify. We were in the Park, a place of Earthly environment, although kind of ghostly outside of a few meters. The main thought I could identify was that we were going to give up on our Earthly bodies and call it. I distinctly remembering that at least I felt at that time that I was 'done' and that it would be acceptable to leave it all behind and stay. That our experience with our bodies was accomplished. The others seemed to agree or at least no one complained. At that thought, I had second thoughts about the plan and I knew that I would not be able to totally release. I took a look at others in the area.

There was another person there that I knew in the physical who was surrounded by others who I understood were not physical. The person I knew still had their wits about them and disappeared after a moment. 

I switched to a 'game' where I was attempting to complete this or that achievements before a certain point. I saw a list and on it were things that I had achieved before which were crossed out. I wish that I could remember what the list said.

I am reading through Roberts Monroe's Ultimate Journeys and attempting to integrate what he has described in his Lifeline group to what I have seen. I know my mother has not passed on yet. But maybe I gave her consciousness a bit of knowledge that could help her when she does pass on. 

I really hope so, otherwise I fear she may be stuck in certain segments of the belief territories upon passing.

There was a point I recall where I shouted 'Higher Self Now' and what happened was a vibrational experience unlike anything like I had experienced before. I had shouted the phrase and nothing had happened other than a humming combined with a huge vibration. It was like when the engines of the Millenium Falcon spool up but the ship doesn't go anywhere because something is still broken. And then nothing. It was frustrating, at the time as well as now, remembering. The frustration was due to the recognition that I had a moment where I was lucid enough to remember that Buhlman affirmation, yet I did not have the described experience. No worries, it will come.

Perhaps I was not far enough from my body or perhaps I was not in a proper mental state, but the command 'Higher Self Now' just did not work inside the mostly lucid 'dream' that I was inside. I shall endeavor to use it when I am more outside the dream.

I had also used the command 'Clarity Now' when I was in the dream and I could not see with much resolution. The command had no impact. 

I was just stuck in a hazy, cloudy, place that didn't have much use for me. And then I woke up.